What does it mean when someone suggests mediation — and how do you know where to start?

Separation can come with a lot of moving parts. Parenting arrangements, finances, communication, uncertainty… it’s a lot to hold. And for many people, the first time they hear the word mediation is when a lawyer, friend, or professional casually mentions:

“It might be time to speak with a mediator.”
“The Court usually expects mediation first.”
“Have you tried family dispute resolution?”

If you’ve heard something like this and felt a bit lost — you’re not alone. Most people don’t realise there are different models of mediation available in Australia and each one has slightly different benefits depending on what you need.

Let’s break them down in a simple, human way.

So… What Is Mediation, Really?

Mediation (or Family Dispute Resolution) is a guided conversation with a neutral professional. The goal isn’t to decide who’s right or wrong. It’s to help both people:

• talk things through safely and respectfully

• explore options for parenting or financial arrangements

• focus on what’s practical and workable going forward

The mediator doesn’t take sides, tell you what to do, or make decisions for you. Their role is to support clarity, communication, and next steps.

There’s Not Just One Type of Mediation

In Australia, there are a few different models. The right fit will depend on your circumstances, timelines, budget, and the level of structure or flexibility you need.

Community / Not-for-Profit Providers

Relationships Australia, Anglicare, UnitingCare, CatholicCare & similar services offer low-cost or subsidised mediation. These services are structured, child-focused, government-funded, and can be a great starting point when affordability matters or when families need wrap-around support.

Family Relationship Centres (FRCs)

These centres provide information, parenting support, referrals, and mediation. They’re often the first step recommended for early separation, especially when parents are beginning to explore arrangements.

Legal Aid Mediation / Conferencing

This option may include lawyer involvement and can be helpful if there are financial limitations or if legal complexity is already a factor. People who meet eligibility criteria may be able to access funded support.

Private Mediators / Private FDR Practitioners

Private mediators generally offer more flexibility — faster booking times, online or face-to-face sessions, and the ability to tailor the process. This can be helpful for families who want privacy, specific scheduling, or a more customised structure.

Lawyer-Assisted Mediation

This model includes lawyers in the room (or online) alongside a mediator. It’s useful when decisions have legal or financial weight, or when someone feels safer with legal guidance available in real time.

Collaborative Law

This isn’t mediation, but it’s another alternative to court — a structured negotiation process where both parties and their lawyers commit to reaching agreements without litigation.

How Are These Models Actually Different?

When comparing options, it can help to think about the practical experience you want.

Some models are faster to book.
Some are more structured or subsidised.
Some are designed with children leading the process.
Some offer flexibility, privacy, or lawyer support.

And some differences come down to professional background.
A mediator with a psychology or social work background may take a communication-focused, child-centred approach that feels supportive and grounded.
A mediator with a legal background may feel more comfortable for situations that are procedurally complex or financially technical.

One isn’t better than the other — just better suited to different needs.

What Should You Think About Before Choosing?

When comparing mediation options, it can help to ask:

• How quickly do we need to start?

• What matters more right now — affordability, speed, or flexibility?

• Are we dealing with parenting, finances, or both?

• Would online or face-to-face feel easier?

• Is lawyer involvement helpful or overwhelming?

• How important is a child-centred or therapeutic approach?

There is no single “right” answer — only what’s right for your family.

A Quick Example

If someone needs structure, support, and affordability:

A community or not-for-profit provider may be the best match.

If someone needs something sooner, private sessions when children aren’t around, or a hybrid online format:

A private mediator or private FDRP might feel more workable.

If the situation involves complex finances or legal questions:

Lawyer-assisted mediation or Legal Aid conferencing might make more sense.

This isn’t about ranking options.
It’s about finding the model that supports clarity instead of adding pressure.

The Heart of It

Mediation isn’t about winning or losing.
It’s about moving things forward in a calmer, clearer way.
It’s about protecting children from conflict.
It’s about being supported in conversations that are hard to have alone.

And for many families, mediation becomes the first step toward rebuilding stability and certainty during a time that feels anything but simple.

If You’re Not Sure Where to Start

You don’t need to have it all figured out before reaching out.
You don’t need to know the “right” model.
It’s okay to ask questions. It’s okay to feel uncertain.

Sometimes the best first step is simply a conversation.

Learn more at: www.guidedclarity.com.au